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Friday, October 19, 2012

Coffee...Tea... It's Not For Everyone



I’m an introvert and dang proud of it.  It’s one of the qualities that I actually love about myself, yet it’s a characteristic that’s often misunderstood.  Most people think introverts are quiet, shy, unconfident, loners, and/or weird.  In truth, those are personality traits that are independent of introversion and extroversion.  Either person could possess any one of those traits – they’re not strictly tied to introverts.  By definition introversion and extroversion describes where one gets their energy.  An introvert gets their energy from solitude and/or one-on-one interactions, and an extrovert gets their energy from group settings.  Here are a couple examples…

INCLEMENT WEATHER
Let’s say your city has been hit by some inclement weather and everyone has been stuck inside for the past three days.  You’ll hear your extroverted friends saying things like, “I’m going stir-crazy.  I need to get out!”  Meanwhile you might not hear a peep from your introverted friends because they’re in hog-heaven.

THE PARTY
An introvert and an extrovert go to the same party.  The introvert eventually finds someone they deem interesting and they’ll spend the better part of the night getting to know that person.  However, by the end of the night, the extrovert has introduced themself to everyone in attendance, and has learned an interesting tidbit about each of them.  Both people leave the party after a few hours and they’ve both had an awesome time.

MONDAY MORNING
It’s almost guaranteed that your extroverted coworker will stop by at some point to say, “Good morning!  How was your weekend?  Do anything exciting?”  The person that never does that is probably an introvert.

What’s my point?  Well there are a few… Generally speaking the extroverts lives for chit-chat of any kind.  They’ve never met a stranger, and they have no problem speaking to anyone.  The introvert, however, calls that “idle chatter” and they have no interest in it.  They tend towards more intimate, meaningful conversation.  They seem to be more comfortable in one-on-one settings where they’re able to truly connect with another person.  Extroverts, on the other hand, just love people.  Close friends, associates, barely know ya – they don’t care.  They love people, they love meeting new people, and they love talking to them all.

Now going back to that notion of “energy” that I spoke about earlier…when you put an introvert in a group setting you may never know they’re an introvert because they can carry a conversation like the best of them.  They’re likeable, relatable, and look nothing like a wallflower.   And even though they appear to be having a blast, they leave completely drained and wiped out.  Being that “on” has taken them from full to empty and the only way to recharge their battery is to get in some alone time – and quick.  Their extroverted buddy?  Whew!  Their batteries are charged only when they’re in group settings, and God forbid they have to experience long periods of solitude, they get dog-tired.  It’s too much and they avoid it at all costs.

Is one better than the other?  Of course not!  We just have to be aware of who we’re dealing with and not take it personal when our introverted friends don’t necessarily want to tag along to every group event that comes up.  In most cases it’s just not fun for them.  They still love you, and would love to go out with *just you.*  The crowd just isn’t their bag of tea – even if it’s caffeinated.



My name is Jasmynne Shaye, and this is me STEPPING ON A FEW TOES.

photo credit:  http://www.stockfreeimages.com/5922063/Jasmine-pearl-tea.html  

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