Are You In Position?

People are often eager to upgrade their vehicle, their wardrobe, or even their hairstyle.  Folks get excited just thinking about the change(s) they are about to make and they can’t wait to step out to show the world their new choice(s).  I’d love to make a suggestion.  Operating with the same gusto you’d have about upgrading your TV from a 20” to a 75” flat screen why not upgrade your associates?  Have you any idea the impact that would have on your life?  And I hate to feel like I’ve got to disclaim everything, but I do.  This is not meant to put anyone down, and it’s not meant to sound elitist.  BUT if you’re looking to learn how to fish you must learn from a fisher.  Want to learn how to ride a motorcycle?  You’re gonna have to learn from a skilled cyclist.  Interested in taking up a musical instrument?  I guarantee you’ll be seeking the advice of a musician.  It seems so simple – so first grade.  But why is it we’ll spend hours on end in our daily lives with people that can’t teach us a thing?  If you’re interested in being a successful business person, you’d better try to apprentice with someone that has a proven track record.  The same goes for any industry or field.  Once the student has outgrown the teacher, it’s time to get a new instructor.  He/she can’t teach you any more than they themselves know. 

Now here’s where it gets fun.  Sometimes YOU’RE meant to be the teacher, and this is where discernment comes in.  There will be times when students will gravitate to you for advice, learning and instruction and you have to be smart enough not to throw them away.  So many intangible gifts come from mentoring others.  And it’s often in having these relationships that we end up learning more about ourselves.  BUT – and it’s a big but – you cannot spend your time helping someone that is unwilling to help themselves.  You need not waste your time with those individuals that are going nowhere and aren’t interested in even looking at the map.  There’s no need.  You have too much to do; too much to accomplish; too much to learn.  And you shouldn’t feel bad about it.  Do you.  Seek out those mentors that you can truly learn from and soak up every bit of knowledge they’re willing to toss your way.  For everyone else you’re senselessly filling your time with?  It’s time for an upgrade.  Inform them.  Don’t inform them – that’s up to you.  My only suggestion would be to get it done with the quickness.  You’ve already wasted enough time with them.  Look ahead at the horizon and visualize the effect this change will have on your future and get excited, cause it’s gonna add way more value to your life than that silly flat screen.  In the very near future just about everyone will own one of those things, but not everyone will have taken the necessary steps to position themselves for excellence.  Take charge and do it for you.

My name is Jasmynne Shaye, and this is me STEPPING ON A FEW TOES.

See For Yourself

Ever been on the receiving end of a compliment from a friend or stranger? Anyone ever say to you:

“That's a great color on you!”

“Your hair looks great!”

“Nice shirt!”

“You look great in that dress!”

“I love your purse!”

“I like our shoes!”

Has any one of those phrases ever been directed towards you? //insert your positive affirmation here\\ Of course they have! And I'm certain on more than one occasion. Do you remember how the compliment made you feel? Did you kinda' perk up a bit? Straighten your spine a little? Inject a little pep in your step all of a sudden? Did you smile right away or try to play it cool like you get that compliment all the time? Bottom line: I don't care how you reacted, but it made you feel good. They just slapped you with an extra dose of confidence. And no matter how bad or rotten your day was going – it instantly got better. Wow...the power of a compliment. It's kind of amazing really.

I was talking to a friend last evening about this very topic, but I flipped the script a bit. Yes, we all love to be on the receiving end, but what about being on the giving end? What about being that person that makes a deliberate effort to give at least one stranger/friend a compliment every day? What's the point in that, Jaz? You're kidding, right? Remember how wonderful you felt when you got your compliment? Why not be that ray of sunshine for someone else? Even if you live in a small city or town you come in contact with people everyday. And most of the time we have no idea what any of these people are dealing with in their personal lives. And even if we have an inkling, we probably don't know the true gravity of it all and the toll it's taking. One simple, genuine compliment can make all the difference. Trust me. Affairs are started and marriages are ended because a spouse was receiving compliments from someone other than the person he/she was married to.

Compliments make you feel noticed, appreciated, and worthy. Mark Twain said, “I can live for two months on a good compliment,” and I guarantee you he wasn't kidding. They're phrases of magic...of power...and when they are truly genuine and well-placed, they can affect change. A compliment? Yes. A compliment.

So I ask, why not be that for someone else? I'm a firm believer that you reap what you sew, if you're in need of some goodness and generosity (and we all are) then start by giving some away – on a daily basis. And come on, people – it doesn't cost you a thing. Totally free. All you have to do is be thoughtful, be honest, and share it with someone. You're already thinking it: I love her haircut... I like that bag he's got... Those are some dope shoes... She is wearin' the heck outta that dress... And if you're thinking it, share it and watch what happens in return. I won't even tell you. I'm gonna let you see for yourself.

My name is Jasmynne Shaye, and this is me STEPPING ON A FEW TOES.

Live It Your Way

This is gonna be a short one today, guys.  I’m on my way out the door and I’m already running late, but I don’t think I’ll have time to write this evening, so here goes…

To any newcomers to this blog, at the beginning of the year I told myself that I’d accomplish one new thing each month.  Just one thing.  One thing that I could be proud of so that as of December 31, 2012 I will be able to look back at the twelve amazing things I got done this year.  And trust me, twelve isn’t much – but it’s a start, and given the challenging year I’m having I will happily take twelve over nothing; which I think is my point.  I’ve never believed that good things come to those that wait.  That’s poppycock.  Good things come to those that work.  Plain and simple. 

So if you care to know, this is where my work in 2012 has gotten me…

JANUARY

STEPPING ON A FEW TOES successfully completed another run by participating in Whitefire Theatre’s Solofest 2012.

FEBRUARY

I participated in another installment of URBAN LEGENDS, a poetry showcase held several times a year in Hollywood, CA.

I co-directed the short play THE BLACK HISTORY OF POLITICS written by Justin Key.

MARCH

I was a featured guest on the Rare Woman show, and the interview can be heard here: http://gvbradio.com/archives/rarewoman-031612.mp3

APRIL

I worked at this year’s Milk and Bookies (http://www.milkandbookies.org/), which is a celebrity charity event that focuses on literacy and giving books to children that don’t have access to books of their own.  It was a wildly fun event and I was part of a host of character actors brought in to entertain the kids in attendance.  The character I played?  The White Rabbit from Alice In Wonderland, and yes – Alice was there with me.  We had a blast.

In addition, I had the great fortune of being the guest on the Rare Woman radio show again last Friday.  Feel free to listen here:  http://gvbradio.com/archives/rarewoman-042712.mp3.

MAY

STEPPING ON A FEW TOES had a successful run of a show sponsored by the Rare Woman organization on May 12, 2012.

I was the guest speaker at A Celebration of Strong Women presented by The Dream Catcher’s Foundation on May 31, 2012.

JUNE

I worked as Associate Producer on CAN YOU SPARE SOME CHANGE, an indie short written and directed by Nicolle Whalen.  It’s a comedic film taking a look at how far one will go to secure funds for a film.  In addition it gives perspective on the homeless living in Los Angeles.  I had a small cameo in the film as well.

JULY

I have created my very first poetry CD.  The title is STILL STANDING and it’s a compilation of some of my most intimate pieces, really letting you into the life and mind of the person that is Jasmynne Shaye.  My poems are laid to original music by Jasonic Audio.  I’m calling it the soundtrack of my life.  Interested in owning your own copy?  Email Noelle Ryan for info:  soft_noelle@yahoo.com

Two more seconds…if you’re reading this and you feel like I’m bragging (1) you’ve missed the point and (2) you’re carrying guilt because you know you’re not getting the job done in your own life.  My point is not to be braggadocios – not in the least.  I put this charge on myself, and I’ve chosen to report my progress in this open forum so that I remain accountable.  That’s what I’m doing.  In addition I want to set the example that all you have to do is make a decision.  Every good deed (and every bad one) begins with a decision.  YOU decide where you want your life to go.  YOU decide what you want to accomplish.  Don’t allow others to make those decisions for you.  The air that you breathe into your lungs sustains YOUR life – no one else’s.  Live it and live it your way. 

My name is Jasmynne Shaye, and this is me STEPPING ON A FEW TOES.

Still Standing

'Tis a happy day, indeed. It's official! It's done and it's in the bag. I have just recorded my very first poetry CD! (this is the part where you applaud or offer some sort of congratulatory remark)

The title of the CD is “Still Standing,” and it contains ten of my original poems set to music composed/written/produced by Jasonic Audio. With the intro and outro it's a total of twelve tracks that welcome you into my life and give you a clearer picture of where I came from. This collection contains some of the most personal pieces that I've ever written, and it's taken me a while to get the guts to put myself on display like this. But I'm ready, and it's time. In order to heal some of my deepest wounds I've got to stop hiding and I have to begin revealing. I can't deal with the ugly if I'm afraid or ashamed to talk about it. So for what it's worth, I'm letting you in, and I'm bearing my soul.

Individual tracks will soon be available via iTunes, and the complete disk is available for purchase for $13.00 USD.

This is a project that I've wanted to do for some time but I kept running into one hurdle after another. Thankfully I didn't give up, because what I've got is a body of work and a product that I am thoroughly proud of. And I'd be a fool to not shout out Jasonic Audio. He has lent his original sounds to create something that I never would have been able to do on my own. I am completely grateful to him and his artistry.

And to anyone reading this blog...if you or someone you know needs a little pick-me-up, “Still Standing” will do the trick – believe me or don't believe me, get the disk and see for yourself.

“Still Standing”

original poems by Jasmynne Shaye

produced by Jasonic Audio

$13.00 USD

paypal: softplay.staff@yahoo.com

or call for more info: 323.347.8554

email: soft_noelle@yahoo.com

My name is Jasmynne Shaye, and this is me STEPPING ON A FEW TOES.

On My Journey

I’m an over achiever.  I am definitely a perfectionist and I’m very task and goal oriented.  And though these are things I’m proud of, I am not in the least bit trying or meaning to brag.  I wish I had a little more “go with the flow” in my DNA; I think life would be easier to live and maybe even a tad more fun for me.  Not that it’s a complete chore right now, it’s just that I haven’t quite got the handle of “taking it easy.”  I only know how to work; how to complete; how to build; how to accomplish.  I don’t really know anything else.  And in all of that I’m striving for perfection in myself and I seek it in others as well – and there’s the tricky part.  That’s when the challenges arise.  I think it’s ok to push myself to the edge and back.  I love trying to squeeze blood out of the turnip that is me – that’s what I live for!  But I’m realizing not everyone else does, and I have to learn to be ok with that.  I’ve at one time or another found myself in personal and/or working relationships with people that in some form or fashion compromised my integrity and all I could do was search for the EXIT door.  Counting the days until the whole thing was over.  Wishing to God I’d never been attached to these people.  The entire situation became agony, burdensome, and just flat out painful; seeming to suck out the very essence of me leaving a dried up, ugly shell behind.  The whole while I’m hating myself for being involved.  

Then someone said to me, “Never let yourself feel like a victim.  YOU know what your objective is and YOU know who you are in your heart.”  He went on to say that if I let myself feel powerless then I was powerless.  He reminded me who I was and told me that just because my name is Jasmynne Shaye I resonate strength and power.  He reminded me that everything is a means to an end – and that’s when it clicked.  In dealing with the junk I had somehow forgotten my purpose and he reminded me of that.  He urged me to focus on that and only that.  And even when I complained about being surrounded by negativity he said, “It takes a mix of negatives and positives to make a whole.  We can not only focus on the positive outcomes and aspects of life.”  He reminded me that the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step and he said, “We all want the positive results and outcomes, but you can’t get there without a journey.”  He said, “Jasmynne, this is just enhancing your ability to adjust.”  And that’s when I got excited because the pig-slop of a situation that was bringing me down would only be temporary.  The growth and life lessons I would learn while on my journey – well, those are permanent.

My name is Jasmynne Shaye, and this is me STEPPING ON A FEW TOES.

Marching On

I don’t understand.  I really don’t understand.  I got up around 7:15 this morning, jumped online, and the first story on Yahoo’s homepage was about a guy that opened fire at a midnight showing of Batman in Aurora, CO and I’m furious.  Of course my heart weeps for the families that lost loved ones, and I ache for those that sustained injuries.  But I am flat out angry because movie-going has always been associated with freedom, fun and family.  We go to the movies to escape our real lives.  We go to bond with friends.  And as artists we go to support those on the screen, to charge our creative batteries, and to get inspired.  We look forward to these opportunities to feed our dreams and all that may have been ruined by one person.  I just don’t get it.  The movies.  Is nothing off limits anymore?  Is anything still sacred?  The movies?  I don’t understand.  And as I search for answers I’m left a little empty and hollow.  What specific events have to unfold in a person’s life to lead them to such an act?  What’s at the root of their unhappiness?  Was it a series of unfortunate events that forced them to “snap,” or was it a single moment that sent them over the edge?  I don’t know, and I probably will never know.  But something has to change; and its incidents like this that make me want to crusade for goodness all the more.  Not to get all “after school special” on you, but I’m a firm believer that it begins at home with the parents.  And please know that I’m not blaming the parents of James Holmes – I have no right to go there.  Right now I’m speaking in general terms and I’m using myself as an example.  I know for a fact that I am who I am today as a direct effect of my upbringing, and more specifically as a direct effect of my parental interactions.  I’ve got no doubt about that.  And though I’ve never had the inkling to bring harm to large groups of people, I have carried lots of anger with me for many years – and that’s not good.

Gosh, am I rambling?  This Colorado business has really got me on one.  Perhaps I should have formed my thoughts a bit better before taking to this blog – but such is life.

All I know is if I’m serious about affecting real change in this world, I’ve got my hands full – but it’s not impossible.  I refuse to let Mr. Holmes’ actions destroy my spirit.  I won’t do it.  I will take a moment to mourn and reflect and then I’m back to work, and I know that I’m not alone.  This country is filled with many people doing great work to help heal and uplift the world and I remain encouraged by them.  They are the soldiers that I have chosen to march with and I couldn’t be happier.

My name is Jasmynne Shaye, and this is me STEPPING ON A FEW TOES.

Quirky Celebration

If you know me at all or have bothered to read a post or two on this thing I’m calling a blog, you know that I grew up feeling like a misfit and it made for a difficult, unhappy childhood.  Elementary school should be nothing but good times and laughter for all kids.  Outside of getting the coodies every now and then, it really should be fun for everyone.  High school is a time when we’re trying to flex our independence a bit with later curfews and self chauffeuring.  We might even get a job to find out what it’s like to earn our own money.  These four years are filled with experiences that are meant to mold and prep us for the supposed ‘real world’ (which is nothing like MTV, btw).  And for those that choose higher education, the years spent at university can be some of the wildest, most exhilarating times you’ll ever see.  Complete independence, making your own decisions, failing or succeeding at your own hand, finding out who you are and gaining precious intellect the whole while.  Great times.  Or at least they should be.  And this isn’t my sob story, because I know I’m not alone, but they weren’t awesome times for me.  Elementary…high school…college…it wasn’t great, and there are several reasons why, but a lot had to do with the fact that I just really never “fit” and I couldn’t understand why.  Everyone would be eager about going left when I wanted to go right.  The vast majority found enjoyment in things that literally got on my last nerve.  The masses seemed to have the same likes, dislikes, values, and integrity.  Then there was me.  Sore thumb me.  But in an effort to not be the odd man out, I did everything in my power to adopt their ways – feeling unfulfilled the whole time.  It was awful, and I would end up being disgusted with myself and embarrassed at my behavior.  Let me see if I can get to my point here…

Moving to Los Angeles, surrounding myself with other artists, has shown me that I’m not alone.  And believe you me, I used to hate people that used their artistry as an excuse to act a fool, be eccentric, or obviously odd for no apparent reason.  All the “craziness” seemed pointless and I swore they were nothing more than shameless attention whores.  And a few of them may be, but the majorities aren’t.  Most of them are individuals that are being true to their true selves and living without fear, shame, or regret. 

I’m getting there – or at least trying.

OK – to my point.  I was speaking with my brother, Justin Key, on Sunday and we discussed the importance of artists surrounding themselves with other artists.  Your closest friends should be artists.  Your lover and most trusted confidant should be an artist.  And Justin and I both agree that this is a bold statement, and it’s one that is frequently discussed amongst creative people.  But the point is, as an artist you have a better chance of being completely understood if you’re surrounded by other creative people.  There will be less need for explaining yourself to death; they’ll just “get it.”  And what a wonderful feeling – to be “gotten.”  It really doesn’t get much better.  When you say that something is a part of your “process” they just get it.  When you say that you have to get away for a bit, they just get it.  When you change the color of your hair six times in a twelve month period – they get it.  Everyone deserves to be understood.  Everyone deserves to have a sense of belonging.  Take this post as gospel or with a grain of salt (whatever that means), but if you’re a creative person, chances are you know exactly what I’m talking about.  Find those people that celebrate your quirks and I guarantee life will become less of a chore.

My name is Jasmynne Shaye, and this is me STEPPING ON A FEW TOES.