I’m Crawling In

During an interview Monica once said that she was too young to know what she was singing about on “Just One of Them Days.”  Well I’m a bit past twelve and I can just about swear she made that song for me.  That one line:  “It’s just one of them days / When I gotta be all alone.”  Hmph!  She’s about to make me go to church with that one line!  Can I get a witness?  Does anyone feel me?  No disrespect to family, no disrespect to friends, no disrespect to my coworkers. None meant to anyone, but sometimes you just want to be left the hell alone.  My Lord.  If for no other reason than to sort yourself.  Sometimes I can’t bring my troubles to you until I make sense of them for myself.  Sometimes I need to let off some steam prior to speaking to you so that I can talk to you like I have some sense.  Whew!  Sometimes I need to retreat to solitude for the sake of our relationship.  If I were to open my lips to speak to you right now you might not like what I have to say, and there’s a good chance I’ll regret a good deal of it.  There’s even a chance I won’t.  Sometimes I get ghost because I’m protecting you.  Because I love you.  Because I care enough about us and our relationship not to go there.  Solitude.  Meditation.  Prayer.  Privacy.  All of that.  I need all of it, and you shouldn’t feel threatened by it.  To all my nears and dears listen when I say this, “I haven’t disappeared because I want nothing to do with you.  I’m taking a siesta for ME.  For my mental health and my own well being.  It’s something that I’m doing for myself.”

Boy I could go on forever on this topic.  But I’ve learned that no one likes reading blog-novels so I won’t.  Just know this.  Whether it’s solitude or a bike ride, or a jog, or music, or a bowl of ice cream;  you have to know what it takes to reset your battery.  When you feel yourself getting stretched too thin; getting pulled in too many directions – you have to know what it takes to get you back to that happy, balanced place.  And no matter what it is (as long as it doesn’t bring harm to you or another), you’ve got to be confident enough to call on your bag of tricks at a moment’s notice.  Don’t be afraid.  Your mental well being is worth it.  Absolutely.  The worst thing that can happen is for you to straight snap on a friend or loved one.  That’s good for no one, and the only reason why those things happen is because we’re not taking care of ourselves.  So again I say, “Do you.”  I’m about to find a hole to crawl into for a little while.  All I ask is that you mind the D-N-D sign that’ll be hanging outside.  I won’t be away for long, I promise.  And when I emerge I’ll do so with a smile on my face and some much needed pep in my step.  Oooo!  I can’t wait!  OK – catch you on the other side.  Peace out!

My name is Jasmynne Shaye, and this is me STEPPING ON A FEW TOES.