"Josh" from Stepping On a Few Toes

In this clip see me as “Josh” from STEPPING ON A FEW TOES.

Josh has been best friend and my rock for many years.  We first met working at a fast food restaurant in Winston-Salem, North Carolina, and boy did we have some fun.  Fast food jobs have got to be some of the worst work anyone can do, but we managed to sprinkle good times and laughter in every single shift we worked. 

I owe Josh so much for being there for me during some of my darkest hours.  Just as I say in the show, he really is the only person that I’ve ever been completely open and honest with.  He created a safe environment for me to share without judgment.  To quote the play, “Thank Goooood for Josh!”

My name is Jasmynne Shaye, and this is me STEPPING ON A FEW TOES.

All Peace With Zero Doubt

Uncertainty vs. certainty.  These are two absolutes.  There is no such thing as being “a little uncertain” or “almost certain.”  Trust me…if you are not completely certain you are automatically uncertain – no matter the percentage. 

500 Days Of Summer.  I didn’t care for it.  No, I mean I REALLY didn’t care for it.  But for some silly reason I rewatched it recently, and it took the whole movie, but this is what I got out of it.  Right there just about at the end Summer says:

“I just woke up one morning, and I knew.”

He responds:  “See that’s what I don’t get.  Knew what?”

She answers:  “What I was always uncertain of when I was with you.”

B  A  M  !!!!

Did you hear that?  Whew!  I had to hit pause, sit up, stare at my screen, hit rewind, and listen again.  Yep.  That’s what she said.  I heard her correctly the first time.  Holy-jamoley.  That small exchange hit me like a ton of bricks.  Uncertainty vs. certainty.  How many times have we been doing something or been in a situation and we kept saying to ourselves or to our friends, “I’m just not sure about xxx.”  Some of us will even carry on this thread of conversation for days…weeks…months… and even years.  Years go by and you’re still saying, “I’m just not sure.”  Hellooooooo!!!  That phrase ‘just not sure’ is equivalent to UNcertain.  Uncertain is equivalent to not right.  Not right is equivalent to wrong.  So whatever that thing, person, or situation is that you’re ‘just not sure’ about is wrong.  Period.  If the shoe doesn’t fit like a glove then it’s the wrong size.  If you don’t have complete peace about this thing, person, or situation then it’s wrong.  That’s it.  Hear me when I say this, 90% sure = uncertain just like 15% unsure = uncertain.  Sorta’ kinda’ has no place in this game.  It really is all or nothing.  And either you’re sitting where Summer sits and you ‘just know’ or you’re sitting on the other side of the table with some form of doubt.  And all I want to do is to get you to think a little bit.  Some of us are spending far too much time with things, people, and situations that don’t give us complete calm and peace.  The question is WHY??  For what reason?  Seriously?  Because you have nothing better to do?  Miss me with that.  There is always something better that you could be doing with your time.  Perhaps that something better requires a bit a sacrifice and some changing on your part, but you ALWAYS have an option.  Always.  Stop pretending you don’t.  There is a life and a world of certainty out there that you’re missing out on because you’d rather stay stuck in your ‘just not sure’ situation.  Well good luck with that.  I would much rather you make the decision to shed that mess and welcome the peace that awaits you.  Seriously.

My name is Jasmynne Shaye, and this is me STEPPING ON A FEW TOES.

Stay In Motion

I am on the hunt for a few things right now…

1-  Touring/Booking Manager for my show

2-  Agent and/or manager that represents stage actors

3-  Detailed info on mounting an Off Broadway show

4-  Sanity

I’ve heard, “ask and you shall receive,” so I’m asking.  If you know anyone or you know something, please do let me know.  I’m all ears.  I spoke about ‘motion’ to a friend of mine last Friday, and we agreed that if you’re not moving ahead you’re going backwards by default.  Time doesn’t stand still and neither does the rest of the world, so you either move and grow with it, or you fall behind and get lost in the shuffle.  Motion. 

Webster’s defines it as “an act, process, or instance of changing place:  movement.” 

Act.  Process.  Change.  MOVEMENT.  None of these happen by standing still.  They all require work.  They require DOING.  And though work and ‘doing’ aren’t always fun, they are always rewarding.  Always.  Because even in those times of failure we’re learning…growing…changing.  There it is.  Change.  Change is the result of motion.  It is impossible to be in motion and come out unchanged on the other side.  It’s just impossible.  When journeying from Point A to Point B change occurs often times without us even noticing.  And whether we know it or not, we cannot get to our final destination without our fair share of it.  Sometimes change is exciting!  New job.  New house.  New spouse.  Other times it’s frightening as hell.  Loss of job.  Evicted from home.  Divorce.  But even in those frightening times we have to figure out how to embrace the change and look at the situation as an opportunity to draw a line in the sand.  What we can’t do is sit and sulk.  We cannot waste the limited time we have crying over spilled milk.  The damage has been done – now let’s move on.  Motion.  Movement.  Even if you can only muster baby-steps, do that.  If the snail’s pace is all you’ve got right now, I’ll take it.  But sitting still is unacceptable.  Good things don’t come to those who wait, they come to those who work…to those that stay in motion.

That’s my two cents.

My name is Jasmynne Shaye, and this is me STEPPING ON A FEW TOES.

Will You Let the Obstacle Win?

Well today is Friday the 13^th.  I’m sure that means something to a lot of people.  For me I just reminisce about the once great movie franchise.  Some people will go so far as to stay indoors all day for fear that something bad will happen to them today.  I’m not one of those people.  But I will use the magic of today’s date to my favor and talk about overcoming adversity.  And with so many examples to choose from I’m gonna’ zero in on homelessness.  Specifically, those celebrities that were one time homeless.  I’ve heard some articles dub it as “Homeless to Hollywood.”  Let’s go there today…

Halle Berry:  lived in a New York City shelter as well as the WMCA

Drew Carey:  lived in his car at one point   

Jim Carrey:  lived in a yellow VW van in various Canadian locations with older brother John Carrey, older sister Rita Carrey, and parents Percy Carrey and Kathleen Carrey/outdoor camping in a tent with his family in the backyard of the home of his older married sister, Patricia Carrey

Kelly Clarkson:  spent time in a car/shelter, with her female roommate after a major structural fire forced them out of a 71-unit apartment building in West Hollywood, California in March 2002

Daniel Craig:  spent some time on a park bench in London while a struggling actor

Carmen Electra:  “You know I had a couple of years of being homeless in Hollywood… a lot of people don't even know this.  I remember sitting on a park bench in the valley… I was crying because I was stranded. It was over 100 degrees outside.”

Djimon Hounsou:  slept in the subway/streets/outdoor camping near the Eiffel Tower for two years beginning at age 13

Jewel:  spent time in a 1979 VW van; joined eventually by her mother/manager Lenedra Carroll, who lived out of her own VW van. Jewel: "I was homeless when I was 18."

Eartha Kitt:  spent time on apartment building rooftops in New York City

David Letterman:  was sleeping in a red 1973 Chevy pickup truck at one point

Phil McGraw / "Dr. Phil":  around age 12 he was homeless and living in a car.  “I was homeless living in a car with my dad. We eventually got a room at the downtown YMCA for five bucks a week..."

Suze Orman:  lived in a Ford van for a while

Tyler Perry:  lived in a convertible Geo Metro in the mid 1990s in Atlanta, Georgia

So on this Friday the 13^th I ask, “What have you REALLY got to be afraid of?”  Things could always be so much worse.  And even if you were, are, or do become homeless…you’re in good company.  I’ve just shown you thirteen examples of triumph.  Thirteen individuals that did not let a bad situation stop them.  Question is; will you let yours stop you?  I sure hope not.

My name is Jasmynne Shaye, and this is me STEPPING ON A FEW TOES.

New Chapter :: New York

I was once told that seven is the number of completion.  As of March 7, 2012 I have been living in Los Angeles for seven years.  I believe in my heart that a chapter of my life closed that day and a new one began on the next.  This new chapter comes with a little anxiety as I have no idea where these new roads are meant to take me.  I’ve not had a chance to look at the plot points of this new section, but I am excited.  I’m excited because I feel like it’s a fresh start of sorts.  But this fresh start brings with it all the wisdom gained over the past seven years.  Not a bad place to be. 

This past Sunday I met (via phone) a guy in PR in New York that showed some interest in me and my show.  We spoke very briefly, but I sent him a media packet and will be on pins and needles waiting to see what he thinks of the DVD.  Whether he is able to provide me any assistance or not, I still get the warm-n-fuzzies just because my info is in the hands of someone in New York – but not just anyone.  Someone in the business and someone that knows others in the business.  That alone puts a little smile on my face.  But I’ll be honest, I can’t help but wonder if New York will play a role in this new chapter of my life.  Something tells me it just might…

My name is Jasmynne Shaye, and this is me STEPPING ON A FEW TOES.

I Am Worth It

I’m writing today on the heels of another great conversation with another great friend. I found out last evening that a college friend and former dance partner of mine has been dealing with serious health issues for the past several years. Reading the email I received from her brought tears to my eyes because (1) I would never want anyone to go through what she’s dealing with, (2) it crushed me to know that someone in my age range is dealing with so many serious health complications, (3) my former dance partner is having to learn how to walk again. I can’t imagine not being able to dance. I just can’t. So as I cried for her last night I also cried for myself because I’d suddenly been given yet another dose of perspective. I’ve been complaining since late December about a list of things. Things that have suddenly made my life a little more complicated than I’m used to, and I’ve been wallowing in my misery, upset with my inability to make decisions and upset with the universe for dealing me a dose of molded lemons. I’ve been sad. I’ve been angry. I’ve been furious. Then I get this email…and it’s as if a finger snapped. “Jaz, are you serious?!?!” I experienced a minor finder-binder last August and that was the first time I’ve seen the inside of a hospital since…what – since I was in elementary school? And even that was due to a sprained ankle. You see where I’m going with this? The value of health. When you REALLY take a moment to sit down and think about it, what is your health worth? Honestly? And all those other things we complain about… Perspective. That’s all I’m saying.

What I really wanted to talk about was that phone conversation I had with my friend. Before I do; can I just say how much I love my friends? Really. I’m not gonna name names, but the ones that I hold near and dear already know who they are and they each mean the world to me. I absolutely LOVE my friends!

So this conversation… I shared with him my most recent bit of inner turmoil – deathly afraid of failure, always afraid of making the wrong decision...and I swear he was like a genie in a bottle! His words of wisdom to be were:
“You become what you focus on. You’re not focused on the art; you’re focused on the fear of failure.
Focus on what you are. Focus on what you have.
Slow down and celebrate your own success.
You are stronger than most men.
You will find that you will continue to reach certain levels of success but you still won’t be happy. HAPPINESS has to be a goal and a focus of yours; not just the success.
Get to a place where you can appreciate yourself. Appreciate YOU!”

The gems were dripping from his tongue so quickly that I had to grab a pen and take notes. Whew! Uggghhh!!! Talk about kicked my butt!?!? GoodNESS! So between the email and the phone conversation, I got set straight in a major way. I realize that changing my thought process won’t happen overnight, but I’m committed to making the change. My health depends on it, and I am totally worth it.

My name is Jasmynne Shaye, and this is me STEPPING ON A FEW TOES.

Searching For Answers

My first posting for April and I am excited to report that things are already on the move. I have been invited to participate in the production of a short film to be shot later this month. I will join the team as first AD & Production Coordinator. The film is a spoof of Paranormal Activity taking a look at how the plot would unfold if it were the home of an African American family. This project teams me back up with Jaimyon Parker which is always exciting. Expect more updates as the month progresses.

It looks as if STEPPING ON A FEW TOES will be appearing in LA in May!!! ==and the crowd goes wild== Rare Woman, the organization that had me as a guest on their radio show, really wants to sponsor a performance of the show and I believe they are looking at some dates in May. Very exciting news, of course, and as more details come out, I will certainly keep you informed.

That’s really about it. I had an awesome conversation with one of my besties last night that really gave me some perspective. I’m sure you’re about tired of hearing talk about the almighty ‘perspective.’ I’m tired of hearing me talk about perspective, but that’s kind of where I’m at right now. Still on the battlefield. Still suited up (Barney Stinson would be proud) [raise your hand if you watch How I Met Your Mother]. And still searching for answers.

My name is Jasmynne Shaye, and this is me STEPPING ON A FEW TOES.